FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Couples Counseling Questions
1. What are the benefits of couples therapy?
As you work together with your therapist, couples therapy can help you understand each other in ways you never have before, while also creating positive changes in your communication, level of trust, and relational intimacy.
We've frequently see couples that were ready to call it quits end up with better and deeper relationships!
4. What therapy approach do you use?
Our approach to working with couples has been deeply influenced by the work of Sue Johnson with Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a thoroughly researched and validated, evidence-based model. We'll work together to help you and your partner repair your ability to trust each other and feel deeply connected.
7. What if we do counseling but it still ends in separation or divorce?
Couples therapy can help couples even if they choose to not stay together. Working together can help peacefully bring the relationship to a close, and help both parties accept, forgive, and move forward with more kindness.
This can often save thousands of dollars in drawn out legal fights, conflicted custody battles, and lessen the scars of emotional wounding from a combative ending, helping both move forward faster and more successfully.
2. How often should we come to therapy?
We like to meet with couples at least once a week. This is especially important for the first 12 sessions. During this assessment phase of our time together, it is important for your therapist to get to know you and understand what is occurring in the relationship.
A lot can happen between sessions and when there is a significant gap between meetings, it can be difficult for everyone to get caught up and gain traction to move forward.
Coming to therapy weekly (or more) can actually decrease the total number of sessions while fostering healing and reconnection sooner.
5. What can we expect during our sessions?
You'll do your first meeting together as a couple while your therapist asks questions to understand the history of your relationship and the conflict or disconnection happening in your relationship.
For the second session you'll meet one-on-one with your therapist. After that, you'll meet weekly as a couple with your therapist.
During your regular sessions after the initial intake phase you might discuss how things are between the two of you, and miscommunications or conflicts that have happened during the week.
3. What if my partner won't come to therapy?
This is a common dilemma. For some, the idea of going to therapy can be scary. One partner may feel guilty for what has happened in the relationship. Or, perhaps allowing someone, even a partner, to see the most intimate parts of themselves just feels too vulnerable.
Sometimes we see couples that have tried therapy in the past without success. During our initial session, we can discuss methods to encourage your partner to give therapy a try.
6. How long will we need to go to therapy?
This depends on many factors, but most couples start to see a shift in their dynamic around session 10.
Regular weekly sessions allow you to gain momentum and discover new moves to use in times of disconnection.
One of the amazing things about EFT is that there is a point when you are done. The timeframe varies, but we will all know when that time has come.